Family Values

Today's blog topic is extremely important and can be somewhat daunting to take hold of and incorporate into your daily lives. We all have them, we all grew up with them - family values. All families are different and many families' values are different. However, the most important thing to remember is that establishing family values for your family is extremely important for the health and development of your children. It is also very instrumental in establishing family norms and healthy relationships both inside and outside of the family.

The concept of "family values" can often be described as political and social beliefs that hold the nuclear family as a unit of society (Wikipedia.org). Sound confusing? I think so. Merriam-Webster's online dictionary defines "family values" as "values especially of a traditional or conservative kind which are held to promote the sound functioning of the family and to strengthen the fabric of society." This definition is a little more clear. Basically, family values can be considered the moral code by which you and your family operate; what you believe; how your kids behave; what you treat as right and wrong; and overall how your family operates in society.

Still confusing? Well, a family value is something you and your family define for yourselves. Respect can be a family value. You respect the opinions of your children, but they must be respectful to you because you are the parent and authority. You and your children are in turn, respectful to others in society. This is a family value - a pretty good one, I might add. Another example? The schooling of your children. Your family may value a homeschooled education, or a private school education. Your family might feel that public schools are the best education your children can receive. Or, your family value might be that no matter what type of education your children are getting, the important thing is to work hard in your education and learn all that you can. This is an example where a family value might vary, and none of these values about education are wrong - they are just different depending on the family. 

Family values also involve establishing right from wrong; moral verses immoral behaviors; your religious or non-religious beliefs; how you treat others; honesty; forgiveness; traditions, etc. They are rules and ideals that you and your family agree to live by. While these may seem mundane, or that you already have them established by default, remember that it is very important to make sure that you have routine family values that you and your children are both aware of.  If every family member can agree on and work toward your family's set of values, this will make for a happier home with better inter-family relationships. These values establish an understanding of what is expected by each family member and allow for children to be nurtured along in these values by parents who are also striving to maintain the same family value while parenting. Values create a mutual understanding among everyone and help kids to develop psychologically, mentally, and even physically. 

Here is an excellent link to an article about defining family values: http://www.parentiq.com/news/definingyourfamilyvalues.asp

Parenting can be difficult, but establishing a set of family values can help you along. When these values are established as a norm, you have a bar set for some of the ways in which you parent. These rules, ideals, and traditions help to define your family and can help to define your parenting as well.

Remember, family values must be positive, not negative and be emphasized around love and caring for one another. Enjoy your week and enjoy your kids!